The Hammersmith Lyric’s Jack and the Beanstalk panto is four out of five stars, telling the classic tale where pupils are inmates at an austere school.
The Hammersmith Lyric’s reimagined take on this familiar story relocates the panto classic to an austere school. Written by Sonia Jalaly, it is rebooted as a thinly veiled criticism of academy schools and Ofsted goals at the expense of creativity.
Director Nicolai La Barrie portrays a school where the pupils are inmates – they are dehumanised given numbers not names. Dancing and singing is banned in this grey school until the arrival of the drama teacher, who doubles as the fairy godfather. He offers some hope that new inmates like Jack can express themselves.
However, headteacher Sir Fleshcreep MBE, played by EastEnders star John Partridge, has other ideas. Fleshcreep is meat-obsessed meanie in a salami-patterned suit who channels Gary Oldman from Slow Horses at his most cynical – and most disgusting too. He warns the Jamaican Fairy Godfather that if he encourages H-imagination he will out of a job quicker than a PTA meeting.
The academy head sends children who want to express themselves, like Jack’s sister Jill played sassily by the excellent Sienna Wid, to the Beanstalk. But this is no traditional panto Beanstalk – instead writer Jalaly has created an evil computer that wipes children’s imagination and makes them thick as a plank ….literally.
The casting is fabulous. Instead of regular Lyric dame Emmanuel Akwafo, this Christmas we get Momma Trott played by the uplifting Sam Harrison, who is the object of the Fairy Godfather’s desires.
Joey James leads as shy Jack who has to communicate via his sock puppet. But when he does find his voice it is worth the wait, which isn’t surprising when you check his James’ theatrical CV, and the rest of the cast do similar justice to fun arrangements of Seven Nation Army to Espresso and Pretty Fly for a White Guy.
Perhaps there are not as many topical or political jokes as usual at the Lyric this year. We do get to enjoy the annual singalong Glory Glory Hammersmith with a Jamaican remix Pon de River from the loved-up Godfather. With Partridge starring, this is a scary Christmas hit that maintains the Lyric’s top billing in London pantoland. Be careful when putting pen to paper for secondary school admissions.
Tickets are on sale, from £10.Until Sunday 4 January 2026,Running time 135 minutes,Ages 6+
