Amanda hadn’t had most of the well-known symptoms and her GP had been unable to help
Menopause hits women in different ways – but for Amanda Fuller it had an unfortunate effect. Amanda first began to experience symptoms when she was 48 and in the middle of a traumatic breakup. “I didn’t know what I was going through was actually the menopause,” she says.
“I didn’t have some of the most well-known symptoms like hot flushes or dryness, so I thought I was just having a bad few months. I felt very angry, but I was going through a stressful time. I’ve never been a crier, but I started crying at everything. When my partner left, I was in the depths of despair and very emotional. My mood was just so up and down. The doctor put me on an antidepressant but I knew I wasn’t depressed.
“I knew there was something else going on. It wasn’t until I watched Davina McCall’s TV programme that I realised I was actually going through menopause.”
The moment of realisation gave Amanda, from Portsmouth, a new sense of resolve, and despite being single, was determined to revive her libido. “I saw the programme over the weekend, and I marched straight to the doctor on Monday morning to ask for help”, says Amanda. “They put me on HRT, and I started to feel better in about four days. I wasn’t so anxious, and I certainly wasn’t so angry. However, my libido was gone.
“I had always loved sex, but now I felt completely dead from the eyebrows down. I thought it was the antidepressant that had killed my libido, or the heart-break I was experiencing when my ex left me. But in hindsight, my interest in sex was gone years before. I became a needy, empty shell of a person. It was a perfect storm – menopause, coronavirus lockdown and a relationship breakdown.”
“I mentioned my lack of libido to the doctor, but he said it wasn’t a problem because I was single,” Amanda says. “I told the doctor that I’d like to imagine somebody touching me again at some point without feeling physically repulsed. I just couldn’t believe he had said that. I then saw a series of different doctors who put me on different types and doses of HRT.
“Three years into my HRT journey, I’d put on three stone, I was frumpy and I just felt old. Nobody looked at me. I didn’t look at anybody else. When a gorgeous 29-year old man showed interest in me, and I dismissed the attention immediately, I realised I really needed to do something.”
Amanda began to go to the gym, losing a stone, which made her feel better. She then saw an online advert for the Issviva x Joylux Vaginal Rejuvenation Device, which uses light energy to rebuild collagen and vaginal tissue.
“I’m a sports therapist, and I’d heard about the benefits of red light for healing so I decided to buy the device,” she explains. “Using the device has been life changing. Everybody has noticed I’ve got my spark back. It was the missing piece.
“After using it for just a few days, everything felt a bit tighter. My job means I know about muscles and pelvic floors. But when I tried to do pelvic floor exercises before, I’d clench and nothing would happen. Now, the sides are touching again.
“Now, I feel flirty again, but I also feel stronger in myself. I used to imagine bumping into my ex and I’d crumple at the idea. Now, I really feel I’m over everything. I’ve experienced a huge change in myself in such a short amount of time.”
