If find yourself lying there awake, try this
There’s something deeply frustrating about lying in bed, staring into the darkness and watching the minutes tick by while everyone else in the world seems to be peacefully asleep. The harder you try, the more impossible it feels.
Before you know it, you’re glancing at the clock again, calculating how many hours you’ll have left if you fall asleep right this second, which, of course, only makes things worse. According to sleep expert Yoshi Kurihara from the UK’s Cosybunks, a shop for premier quality bunks, this nightly struggle is far more common than most people admit, and the key to overcoming it lies in what he calls the “15-minute rule”.
Yoshi said: “If you’ve been lying in bed for what feels like 15 minutes and you’re still awake, get up. Don’t stay there trying to force it. Lying in bed when you can’t sleep actually teaches your brain to associate your bed with wakefulness rather than rest, which is the exact opposite of what you want.”
He added that this simple trick can reset your body’s relationship with sleep: “By getting out of bed, even just moving to a quiet spot and reading a few pages of a book or listening to calming music, you help break the cycle of frustration and anxiety that keeps you awake. Once you feel drowsy again, return to bed. This helps your mind relearn that bed means sleep.”
Try getting up
It might sound counterintuitive, but getting out of bed when you can’t sleep can actually help you sleep better. Yoshi explained that when you lie awake for too long, your brain starts linking your bed with feelings of alertness, worry, or restlessness.
“Over time, this association can make insomnia worse,” he said. “You end up trapped in a cycle of anxiety, worrying about not sleeping makes you even less likely to fall asleep.”
By stepping away from the situation, literally, you interrupt that mental loop. “Leaving the bedroom for a short while, maybe sitting in another dimly lit room, tells your body that the bed is for sleeping only,” Yoshi said. “When you come back, your brain recognises it’s time to rest again, which makes drifting off much easier.”
This concept is based on stimulus control therapy, a proven cognitive behavioural technique often recommended by sleep specialists. It trains your mind to connect certain cues – like your bed – with specific behaviours – in this case, sleeping. Over time, it can dramatically improve sleep quality.
Don’t clock-watch
One of the biggest culprits behind sleepless nights is our obsession with the clock. Watching the numbers change might feel harmless, but it’s actually fuelling stress and preventing sleep.
“When we focus on how long we’ve been awake or how much time we’ve got left to sleep, it triggers anxiety and raises cortisol levels,” Yoshi explained. “You’re essentially keeping your brain in a state of alertness. The more you check the clock, the harder it becomes to relax.”
“Turn your clock away or place your phone face down,” the expert advised. “You can’t control the time, but you can control how your body responds to it. Focusing on rest, rather than sleep itself, helps your mind ease into the right state naturally.”
Beware of bedtime scrolling
Even if you’ve escaped your bed following the 15-minute rule, there’s one thing you definitely shouldn’t reach for and that is your phone. Yoshi warned that late-night scrolling is one of the most damaging habits for sleep quality, even more so than many people realise.
“People often think a quick check of social media or watching a video will help them unwind, but it actually does the opposite,” he said. “The blue light from screens suppresses melatonin, the hormone responsible for sleep regulation. Without enough melatonin, your body’s internal clock becomes confused, and that leads to restless, shallow sleep.”
He added that scrolling also overstimulates the brain: “Your mind doesn’t distinguish between excitement and stress. Whether it’s a funny video, a heated debate, or a worrying news story, your brain stays active, which makes falling asleep nearly impossible.”
Create your own wind-down zone
If you do find yourself up in the middle of the night, Yoshi recommended having a calm, low-stimulation activity ready to go.
“Pick something relaxing that doesn’t involve screens or bright lights. Gentle stretching, journalling, or reading under a soft lamp can work wonders,” he said.
He also stressed that comfort mattered: “Keep the lighting dim and the environment cool. If you can, make yourself a warm, caffeine-free drink like chamomile tea. The idea is to tell your body, ‘It’s safe to rest now.’ That calm signal helps melatonin production kick in again.”
Rethinking bedtime anxiety
According to Yoshi, one of the most overlooked aspects of good sleep is mindset. “Many people approach bedtime with dread,” he explained. “They’ve had so many bad nights that they start assuming it’ll happen again. That creates a self-fulfilling prophecy.”
To break that pattern, he recommends focusing on relaxation rather than the act of sleeping: “You can’t force yourself to sleep, but you can control your environment and your attitude. Think of rest as beneficial even if you don’t fall asleep right away. Deep breathing, meditation, or simply lying quietly with your eyes closed can help your body recharge.”
Yoshi emphasised that consistency, in bedtime, wake-up time and pre-sleep routine, was one of the strongest predictors of good sleep. “Your body thrives on routine,” he said.
“Try to go to bed and wake up at roughly the same time every day, even on weekends. It keeps your circadian rhythm balanced, which helps you fall asleep faster and wake up more refreshed.”
