Emily Hausman, from Utah, US, has been looking forward to celebrating the Christmas holidays with her little baby, Ezekiel, ever since she fell pregnant via a sperm donor
A mother is spending her first Christmas as a single mum with her sperm donor baby — and says he doesn’t need a dad.
Emily Hausman, 43, is determined to make Christmas as magical as ever this year, seven months after giving birth to Ezekiel. He was conceived when Emily sought out an anonymous sperm donor and underwent IVF.
But just weeks after giving birth to her son, Emily was diagnosed with stage four metastatic melanoma cancer — and so she says this festive period will be bittersweet. The mum, from Utah, US, has had two rounds of immunotherapy so far but admits she is scared to be “staring mortality in the face”.
Speaking today though, Emily said: “I absolutely love Christmas and I’m beyond excited to share it with my baby. He already lights up at the lights and Christmas music. He’s surrounded by so much love; having him makes the holidays feel extra special this year.
“I may not have a lot, but I have so much love and joy — and that’s what I want Ezekiel to grow up knowing during the holidays. Everything feels more meaningful now.
“After a lot of reflection, I realised that choosing to do it on my own didn’t mean I was giving up on having a family or meeting the right person someday. It just meant I wasn’t willing to settle or tie myself to someone who wasn’t ‘my’ person.”
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Just two months into her pregnancy, she suffered a subchorionic hematoma — a blood collection between the uterine wall and the outer foetal membrane — landing her in hospital. At the same time, she lost her job due to company layoffs.
She said: “I honestly couldn’t believe everything was happening to me all at once. I’ve faced plenty of complicated challenges in my life, and I’ve always managed to keep moving forward. My luck has never been terrible, but it’s never been easy, either.
“This time, the rug was completely pulled out from under me at one of the most vulnerable moments of my life. But I knew I had to do whatever it took to make sure my baby would be okay. There wasn’t space for fear — only focus.”
Ezekiel is now seven months old. However, Emily has been unwell for the majority of his life and so she is determined to embrace Christmas. She added: “I developed a blood clot in my uterus and had to be rushed in for emergency removal.
“I was utterly exhausted and trying to keep up, but my body just couldn’t handle it. I felt like I was failing as a mum, overwhelmed with guilt for being away from my baby. Then the doctors discovered I had endometritis and a fever. I had barely recovered a few months later when one of my breasts stayed hard after I stopped breastfeeding.”
Emily was “hysterical” when she received her cancer diagnosis in around June this year. She said: “All I could think was, ‘I finally have the most precious gift — my baby — and now it’s all going to end.
“I had just begun to feel like I was living the life I’d always wanted, even with the chaos and the hurdles. And suddenly, it felt like it was all being ripped away.”
On top of the emotional and physical strain, finances became another challenge. Her unemployment benefits ended just a week before her diagnosis.
She is now undergoing treatment and has completed two rounds of immunotherapy. A friend set up a GoFundMe to help with expenses, which has raised £82,000 of its £91,000 goal.
Emily hopes that by sharing her story, she can show others that no matter how dark life becomes, it’s always worth fighting through it. And she is determined to make her son’s first Christmas magical, no matter what.
“I’m staring my own mortality in the face — and it’s terrifying. Don’t wait for anyone or anything in life. There’s never going to be a ‘right time’ — only the present. And every time I look at my sweet baby’s face, I’m reminded of how lucky I am. He’s the reason I keep going.” To donate to the fundraiser, visit this link.
